Back Yourself First
Waiting for someone to come rescue you, save the day or make you feel better is not going to happen. The mindset you need if you want to eliminate a personal problem, big or small is exactly the same mindset you need if you want to go from good to great to amazing.
You’ve got to BACK YOURSELF. Back yourself to do whatever it takes. To be resilient in the face of adversity and setbacks. To be tenacious in the face of struggle and hard work. To be relentless and keep on keeping on.
This puts the ball squarely in your court. I can see some of you now. - you´re nodding your head saying "YEP, sure, got it!." But what you´re really thinking is: "Easy for you but not so easy for me. I´m shy. I don't like to put myself out there. And as far as I'm concerned, some people are just born with it. Right?¨ WRONG! No one, absolutely no one, is bon into this world ready and equipped to crush life. In fact, it's quite the opposite. Backing yourself is a DECISION! It’s not a personality trait. It’s a habit that you develop. In this way, you train yourself every day to: Be a bold decisive action taker, not a procrastinator. To take full ownership, not indulge the victim or excuse maker mindset. Be driven, and honour hard work, instead of being lazy and/or self entitled. However. This isn´t always easy. Some people, through no fault of their own, will have unconsciously and accidentally developed some of these bad habits. Bad habits like the victim mindset. But instead of beating yourself up for acting like a victim (because that's helpful), it's way more useful and productive to think about it this way: The victim mindset is often learned as a fear response. If I can convince myself that, "it’s too hard, I don’t have what it takes, I can’t cope, it’s not fair" or, "why does this keep happening to me, what’s wrong with me, I’m such a screw up" or the popular, "I’m just meant to be this way anyway so what’s the point?!” then I've given myself the perfect excuse. Now, I don’t have to do any hard work, I don’t have to face my fears, I don’t have to make any bold, scary decisions, and I certainly don’t have to back myself or put myself on the line. Instead, I can just hide behind self pity and blame. Let's use another example: If you grew up in an environment where, if you complained enough as a toddler, child, and then adolescent, you eventually got your way, then you’re essentially being rewarded for complaining. You unconsciously create the assumption that, “if I complain enough, eventually somebody will fix it for me.” There are many different ways we can become conditioned. And it´s important to know that it’s not your fault. These are coping mechanisms, adaptations and compensations that were learnt unconsciously - outside of your awareness. However, the key here is that these are LEARNED HABITS. Learned habits that you can unlearn. Want to know how?? It all starts with self awareness. Self awareness and self honesty. Don’t beat yourself up. These habits do not DEFINE you. They are simply learned behaviours. It's essential that you acknowledge that you were doing the best you could and you didn’t know any better. All of us have blind spots. You simply don’t know what you don’t know. So how can you be held accountable for not knowing what you don’t know?! Now that you DO know, now you have a choice, are you going to live your life from a place of fear disguised as practicality? OR Are you going to be courageous and take bold, decisive action IN SPITE of the fear?
Are you going to hide and bury your head in the sand? Telling yourself that “It’s not that bad, I’ll get around to it later... OR Are you going to own your mistakes, take ownership, and refuse to tolerate excuses from yourself, or a life of mediocrity and stumbling along? Are you going to be lazy, self entitled, and indecisive? OR Are you going to demand an extraordinary quality of life and honour the hard work required to create it? The decision is up to you. But remember this: Backing yourself doesn’t mean you have to go it alone. Depending on the problem you are trying to overcome, you may need a coach to point out your blind spots and to correct the mistakes that all of us make whenever we are learning something new. You also know that the devil is in the details and there’s a huge difference between intellectually understanding something - to then applying it for real - to then mastering it so that it becomes a habit. Regardless if you need a coach or not, YOU are the one who is going to have to do the work. This is why you have to back yourself. And backing yourself is a DECISION. It’s the simple decision to say… “That’s not who I am anymore! I used to be an excuse maker and I used to play the victim, and that’s ok. I’m not going to beat myself up for that because that’s where I was at in that phase of my life. But I’ve moved on from that now. Indulging excuses and the victim mindset is now a complete violation of who I am, what I stand for and where I’m going in life. It’s so far beneath me now that I refuse to go there. I make life happen now. I am a leader in my life. I’m no longer a passenger, just stumbling along tolerating a life of mediocrity. I’m ready for the next level in my life now.” THAT is backing yourself. And THAT is when the magic happens.
If you need someone to help you start backing yourself with your nutrition and training my next 10 day detox is August 16, 2021 and 6 week get fit program Sept 20th. Just reply back to the email if you want in on one of these programs to starting backing yourself.
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